Sphincterpiece Theater

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Pathology Report:

Procedure: Flex Sigmoidoscopy
Clinical History: Colonic distention, query volvulus
Gross Description: one specimen is received in formalin, the specimen labeled “splenic flexure bx” consists of one tissue fragment, measuring 0.2 X 0.2 X 0.1 centimeters. It is submitted in toto between two sponges.
Histologic sections demonstrate scant fragments of tissue, which show no significant inflammation or architectural changes. There is no fibrinous pseudomembrane or subepithelial hemorrhage to support ischemia. An immunohistochemical stain for CMV is negative.
Clinical correlation is recommended.

  • Melissa (DrSnit)

    *clapping wildly* Brav-o!!!!!!

  • Why was it submitted in Dorothy’s dog from the Wizard of Oz? Wouldn’t a specimen cup be better? Or did Toto eat the specimen up in the OR?

    See what I did there?

    • Nice. Hey, I don’t dictate these reports, some pathology resident does. And by “in Toto” I assumed they meant tucked into an album sleeve from the band Toto, preferably the record containing the smash single Africa.

      • Doc Quixote

        All I wanna do when I wake up in the morning is see your eyes, Rosanna!

  • Now, see, what’s with that nice Rene Najera person trying to be funnier than Zdogg et al? just kidding.

    Nice job on the reading. I really should record and send you one of the numerous radiology reports that I could read/invent/whatever. I’m pretty sure it’d get some play here and there (at least in my own mind, that is!). Such reading would of course carry more bs weight if read by this radiologist!

    Nice job once again!

    • Paul, I envision a guest reading by yourself STAT. And then I could interview you for Inside the Doctor’s Studio!

    • I could never be funnier than the ZDogg crew… Well, maybe in Spanish.

  • ooh, I’m game for that! (I think?!)

  • Christine

    You are crazy. Clinical correlation is recommended. Love it.

  • Doc Quixote

    Once more into the rectum dear friends, once more;
    Or close the anus up with our English dead.

  • Tom Vento

    ZDogg- You are a god amongst men. I would love to see you and Dr Ken Jeong do a buddy comedy together.

  • Doc Quixote

    I hear the drums echoing tonight…wait, are we still doing Toto lyrics?

    • Sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti!

  • DocYates

    C’mon, give us a break. First off, when does one need a histologic examination to “rule out volvulus”? Shit comes in, shit goes out.

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