Call Day! (Rebecca Black Friday Parody)

Production Notes (from the files of famed producer DJ Muffintop):

Once in a while, in the career of a music producer such as myself, you strike gold.

Friday Parody Call DayOr at least molybdenum. That is exactly what happened to me when ZDoggMD and his boys Dr. Harry and Dr. Diego walked into my studio. With their receding hairlines, crow’s feet, and flabby musculature, they had a rampant sexuality reminiscent of a less attractive Fabulous Thunderbirds. I knew I had found the key to capturing the hearts of the elusive “over-90-years-old” demographic.

I tried to play it cool. “What can I do for you boys?”

ZDoggMD, the stocky frontman, stepped forward, emanating the kind of hair-on-the-back masculinity that is appealing to almost nobody. “We want to be stars!” he blurted.

“Every other pre-pubescent girl with a sub-par singing voice wants to be a star. What makes you think that you have what it takes?” I asked derisively.ZDoggMD Dr. Harry Call Day

Dr. Z’s initial bluster faded, and his eyes began to tear up. With an audible sob in his voice, he answered, “Sir, we may not have the talent, looks, or charisma…but we certainly have the hunger!” He closed his eyes, and whimpered softly, “I need to be famous!”

Dr. Harry shifted uncomfortably, and Dr. Diego appeared confused; he tapped ZDogg on the shoulder and whispered, “You told me we were going to Best Buy!”

If my screaming producer instincts were not enough to convince me to take them on right then and there as clients, their money certainly did the trick. Hoping to duplicate the mega-success of Rebecca Black’s music video Friday, I’ve allowed the good doctors to attach my illustrious name to their work, while giving them the privilege of writing, recording, producing, financing, and directing it on their own. The result, I’m sure you’ll all agree, is yet another DJ Muffintop masterpiece!

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Call Day!

7AM steppin’ onto the unit
Gotta couple waitin’ in the ED
Gotta write some notes, gotta see some old folks
Stressin’, cause my pager’s howlin’
beeping on and on, everybody rushin’
Tryin’ to get down, to a Code Blue
I run the opposite way, but I see my intern…

Puttin’ in an IJ
Straight in the carotid
Lookin’ on the bright side
We got the ABG!

It’s Call Day, Call Day
Gonna get killed on Call Day
All the clinics dumpin’ patients for the weekend, weekend
Call Day, Call Day
Train wreck transfer OK’d
He was billed as stable, but this looks like VT!

Shock him then shock him again (clear!)
Shock him then shock him and then (clear!)
Drug-shock-drug-shock
This never works as well as on TV…

2:45, I’m tryin’ to get some shuteye
Nurses keep pagin’ about bed 5
Ms. Lee can’t pee
Plus she’s lost her IV

I got this, she can’t piss, it’s time to place a Foley
You got this, please don’t miss, oh…it’s in her butt — HOLY!

Shock her then shock her again (clear!)
Shock her then shock her and then (clear!)
Drug-shock-drug-shock
Are you supposed to shock sinus brady?

It’s Call Day, Call Day
Everyone wants Demerol day!
All the patients comin’ in and drug seekin’, seekin’
Call day, call day
Capped like Biggie Smalls, hey
Shoulda done dermatology like my daddy told me…

Yesterday was pre call
Today we are on call
We we we so darn tired
We so darn tired
We gonna flush our pager today!

Tomorrow we are post call
I’ll maybe, sleep afterwards
But I just want this call day to end!

RAP:

Z-Dogg…and Doctor Harry!

I’m chillin’ here in Pedi
Get a call from the ED
Dumpin’ turfin’
Tight wheeze, febrile seize
Abscess on his side
Shooting by is some vomitus in front of me
Another sick tot with thick snot, wanna scream
Give a neb, it’s Call Day, we outta beds
I wanna go home, come on come on y’all!

It’s Call Day, Call Day
Gonna get kicked in the balls day
Everybody dumpin’ on us cause we’re in house and it’s
Call Day, Call Day
Shoulda gone into law, hey
But now I get to play with electricity

Shock him then shock him again (clear!)
Shock him then shock him and then (clear!)
Drug-shock-drug-shock
Wish I could just use this thing on me…

  • Doc Quixote

    The saving grace of the original Rebecca Black video was a sweet, thirteen year old innocence, bordering on precocious. Which is the exact quality that Dr. Diego brings to this version! Props to Dr. Harry on his portrayal of Mrs. Lee…I was convinced! The finest acting since “Citizen Kane.” Or at least since “Highlander 2: The Quickening.”

    • There can be only none!

      • Doc Quixote

        In space, no one can hear you imitate a twelve year old who considers eating cereal noteworthy enough to include in a song…wait, what was my original point?

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  • Tina

    I don’t know yet whether I should be grateful that my husband has finally found a new song and is no longer singing Monty Python’s lumberjack song …

    • Dang it! Now that damned lumberjack song is in my head for the next week…

  • Here’s to hoping you get some of the Google ad money, but money aside some parodies are priceless. You may get those fab fifteen minutes of Warhol fame yet:).

    • I’m hoping to steal Rebecca Black’s last 30 seconds of aforementioned fame!

  • Mama Tao

    Sweet evil goddess moon tits! I want a lobotomy now. I can has?

    (I still like it better than that CrAzY, big toofed, 12-year-old girl!)

    • Lisa

      Mama Tao, you’re just hateful. This video was wonderful. I laughed a lot!

      • Mama Tao

        Whaever…you talk to yourself!

        • Lisa

          …!

    • Doc Quixote

      Did I hear moon tits?

      • Mama Tao

        Indeed, sir! I’ll let you see them for a dolla’ (holla holla!)

  • OK. Dammit. You guys are freaking geniuses… I think I have found my new ring tone! This is seriously awesome! You people deserve a Grammy or something… or maybe a few call days off!

    P.S. When I poked my first I-J placement into the carotid, the senior resident said the same thing about ABG…

    • Arterial blood, whether intentional or not, is always exhilarating! Thanks for the word homie.

      • Chris

        But does it always look and taste like ketchup?

  • dr kathleen

    Gosh…reminds me all over again why I went into medicine! The warm empathetic song is just running around my mind. Youse guyz are a gift to Medicine and all of humanity…thank you thank you thank you

  • Mama Tao

    Zdogg, I was trying to google you and I messed up. Did you know there is a poor man out their who has the name Dr. Zogg, MD???

    • Mama Tao

      *there* …Whatever, I’m drunk!

      • I shall have to have an epic rap battle with him!

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  • Susan Senzaki

    This was funny! When do you have time to do these hillarious videos? BTW…going to the 20 year reunion at CW? It’s gonna be in August!

    • Thanks, but quit reminding me of how old I am! I can’t do reunions, I’m afraid some aging jock will try to give me a wedgie.

  • David Lewis

    Brilliant! UK premier at teaching tomorrow!

    • We’ll be bigger than the Beatles! What? Sorry, I just had an MIA (Megalomaniacal Ischaemic Attack). Stick that in your oesophagus, America! Viva la France! What? I need to take my haldol. Thanks for the feedback, sir.

      • Doc Quixote

        I think you have some cerebral oedema!

  • Marie

    You guys are hilarious! This is likely going to be my new call theme song in Peds!! Love it, keep the videos coming!!!

  • Love it!

  • Sarah

    So funny after a long call night that induced hysteria (it’s also possible the hysteria was secondary to the multiple 3am calls for Tylenol suppositories)….
    My request is for a song educating the elderly and their family members about updating code status before it becomes an urgent decision that leads to intubate, trach, PEG, and wasting away in a L-tac unit. I have complete confidence that your crew alone can save people from long, unhappy demises in skilled nursing units.

    • Sarah, that is a brilliant idea! The Notorious D.N.R!

      • Slf

        The Magic Initials – funny, educational, and a contribution to society. Let people create their own discharge plan to heaven.

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  • Once again you make me pee in my pants, Zdogg. And I’m a peds hospitalist so I love the plug-ins by Dr. Harry. I’ll make sure to send it to my hospitalist friends.

    • Thanks, fellow sufferer-in-arms!

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