Health 3.0 means inpatient and outpatient, acute and subacute and post acute and hospice, everything…the whole continuum of care integrated, communicating, seamless, in service of the patient and in support of caregivers too.

We here at ZDoggMD Industries tend to focus on the acute side a bit much, a side effect of our hospitalist background. But not this time. WE NEED AN OUTPATIENT CLINIC JAM STAT!

It’s time we celebrated and elevated the unsung heroes of healthcare, our outpatient soldiers! Medical assistants, billing specialists, nurse practitioners, front office staff, physician assistants, pharmacists, nurses, CNAs, phlebotomists, health coaches, techs, MDs, DOs, veterinarians (YES). The people who keep them patients flowing and rooms roomin’, despite the yoke of Health 2.0’s bean counters thwarting them at every turn.

So share this jam with your favorite MA, NP, PA, outpatient doc, coder, and anyone holding it down in the clinic world. And download the track on iTunes, Spotify and more! Z-Pain OUT!

Credits:

Written and performed by ZDoggMD

Audio engineering and mixing by Devin Moore

Directed by Tom Hinueber

Cinematography by Logan Stewart

Edited by Logan Stewart, Tom Hinueber, and ZDoggMD

Production Assistant was Melat Demeke

Based on “Low” by Flo Rida and T-Pain

 

In Tha’ Video:

ZDoggMD (as Z-Rida and Z-Pain)

Tony Hsieh, CEO of Zappos (Snapchatting patient)

Stephanie Lapid RN (Workin’ the IV Pole)

Anjaly Curley, MD Diagnostic Radiologist (Dancer who knocks dat Boost out of ZDogg’s hands)

Brendan Curley, DO, MPH Medical Oncologist/Hematologist (Doc Dancer)

Danica Joy Illagan, Pharmacy Student Roseman University (Medical Assistant and Dancer)

Steven Uy- Pharm D  (Dancer and potential foley cath recipient)

Christine Estrada, DO (Doc trying to chart)

Julie Elizabeth Westra RN (Nurse trying to place foley)

Tom Hinueber (Patient with Mullet)

MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM
Let me talk to ‘em, Let me talk to ‘em
What a pain
MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM
Fax the auth to ‘em (Come on!)
 
Shorty had them apple bottom scrubs
Crocs with the fur
The whole day billing medi-carrrrre
They NPO
She checks glucose
Sugar got low low low low low low low low
 
Them baggy bouffants and the danskos with the strap
Turned around and gave that big booty a pap (HEY)
They got a cold
Want azithro
Shawty’s like no no no no no no no no
 
(hey)
I ain’t never seen nothing that’ll fix the flow
Them patients lined up waiting to go
Bought a million dollar EMR that blows
Press Ganey never seen a score so low
So sensible
She was flexible, professional
Billing extra codes
Hold up wait a minute, do I see a drug rep, aw no
Did her thing, I seen shawty write notes
Copy-pasting, then the thing froze
Make it rain, tech makin’ it slow
Work the codes, to make the payroll
I’m a say that I can’t stand it no mo
Revenue flat reimbursement so low
PA help STAT! patients lined out the do
But my MA always know where they go
She had them
 
Apple bottom scrubs
Glued to tha’ phone
Drug seekers yelling at her
They hit the do’
It’s way past 4
Shawty’s like no no no no no no no no
 
Them baggy scrub pants with the tourniquet strap
Turned around and gave that big AC a smack (HEY)
She hit the flow
Next thing ya know
Patient got low low low low low low low low
 
Hey shawty what I gotta do to get you roomed
Schedule jam packed full of nasty wounds
Double-booked, got stacks of people left to do
EMR so wack, thanks to meaningful use
1 click (come on) 2 clicks (come on) 3 clicks (come on)
And that’s 1 med
What you think, I’m playing? I’m just clicking for the man, and the fax is always jammed
That’s when I told her
My staff can move boulders
They outpatient soldiers
This pot full of Folgers, got them all bipolar
They all working over, burnt out like a toaster
Insurance and government try to control her
All these bean counters are jokers
Patients keep watching these shows errr
Sorry but Oz is a poseur
She showed her
 
Apple bottom scrubs, crocs with the fur
PA MA Nurse practitioners
We doctors know
That teamwork’s dope
Clinic got flow flow flow flow flow flow flow

  • Kalaki Clarke, MD

    I’m not sure what assylum you escaped from, ZDoggMD, but they definitely need to release more of your kind.